One of Those Days... *Sigh*

You ever have one of those days?  Where at the end of the day, if given the opportunity to redo the day, you would just stay in bed all day?  Well, I did…and I lived to tell about it, so here we go…

It started as any normal Saturday, with Keller waking up around 6.  (At what point do they start sleeping in until 10?)  We have started trying pieces of food instead of pureed and Keller gags/chokes on everything.  So I had decided I was going to try making him a scrambled egg.  (Well, really, I decided Dustin was going to make it, but he sleeps too late so that didn't work out as planned.)  I thought if I scrambled it real fine, it would slide right down and we would be well on our way to eating real, solid food.  Wrong.

Reason #457 why I don't cook...  As I go to get the egg out of the fridge, I apparently had the dropsies - egg all over the floor. *Sigh*

Fast forward 15 minutes - egg is cleaned up, scrambled egg is made, Keller is prepared to try his first bite of deliciousness.  And he gags.  Try an even smaller bite, even more gagging.  *Sigh*

Oh well.  Since texture is big at this age, I decided to let him play with it.  Fun! By the time we're done, there's egg all over him and his clothes and the high chair, though with a dog on either side of him, we've managed to keep the floor clean....well, eggless.  So I go get his bath ready and strip him down in his high chair.  Check the diaper, looks good, drop it, pick him up, go put his bowl in the sink, come back to the high chair to throw his clothes downstairs and diaper away and uh-oh...  It appears there was in fact poop in the diaper.  Hmmm...so this cute little butt that's resting against my stomach... *Sigh*

Clean him up, change my shirt and on to the bath. So, Keller's playing in the bathtub and I'm perusing Facebook.  In the midst of sending a birthday message, I think I hear bubbles coming from the tub.  I check everything out and all looks good.  Probably just him banging toys together I assure myself.  I go back to writing my birthday message when I see it - The Poop Face.  Noooooo!  There are certain times when you know Keller's pooping - his face gets red, little red lines form between his eyebrows, there's grunting, and he just has this look.  (He's really going to appreciate this when he gets older.)  This was one of those times.  I rush to pick him up out of the tub (to do what with him I don't know) but I'm too late.  Poopapalooza.  *Sigh*

Later that morning, Keller and I made our way to the Galleria to get mama a new pair of shoes.  So we go into Macy's and I stroll by the men's shirts.  I find one I like, head over to get my shoes, pay and we're on our way.  Maybe I'll head back by the men's shirts real quick.  Find another one and buy it.  While I'm here, where are the kids clothes?  3rd floor, of course, so we make our way to the elevators.  Side note - Why in the hell are department store elevators soooo slow?  Seriously, there aren't 15 floors in this place...what could possibly take so long?  Fuckin' gaggle of turtles having a pow-wow upstairs on the elevator.  Finally... Get to the 3rd floor, find nothing, of course, and head back to the 1st floor.  One more stop by men's (because I'm terribly indecisive) and as I'm browsing Keller gets "the look".  And then the grunting starts.  Here we go again.  Buy another shirt.  Where are the women's restrooms?  2nd and 3rd floor...because it would make too much sense to have one on the 1st floor.  Back to the dreaded elevators. 

By this time I have to pee so I head into the bathroom only to find out the handicapped stall is out of order.  WTF?!?  Now what do I do?  The stroller and my bags and all his shit certainly isn't fitting into a regular sized stall.  Unbelievable.  Slightly baffled and refusing to make another trip to the elevator, I begin taking my valuables out of the stroller, starting with Keller.  Then my wallet and phone and keys.  And I then attempt to balance everything while hovering.  *Sigh*

Finally get out of that place, take Keller for his first trip to Crate & Barrel (which he loved, obviously) aside from seeing a lady fall…hard…when she tried sitting in a chair that was not meant for sitting.

Went to our friends Jonathan and Laura's house that evening for a cookout.  With the day I'd had, I should have known to just call it a day.  Didn't.  And the Lord said you haven't seen a shitty day yet.  I'll spare you all the details because I'm getting tired of writing and I'm sure you're getting tired of reading.  Are you still reading this?  Wow, I'm impressed.  So, what had happened was...the biggest hail storm in the history of hail storms came rolling through right where we were located.  Right on top of my new Kia.  Shattered my windshield and put a beatdown on the hood and roof and threw a few in on the doors just for good measure.  And this was no typical pea- or golf-ball sized hail.  Oh no...we're talking baseball sized.  Looked like somebody brought that fuckin' gaggle of turtles from the 15th floor and pow-wow’ed them right at my hood.  *Sigh*

Here are a few updated pictures of my sweet boy.



I'd rather be naked!

  

First time swinging...love it!

First Cardinals Game

Mother's Day Kisses...My Favorite Picture Ever

Dear Keller #3

Dear Keller -

You've been in the world for 8 whole months now! Technically I guess it's really been 17 months but those first 9 were in utero and don't really count. Never mind... Why am I explaining myself to an 8 month old? So, what have you been up to since my last letter? Well...

You said your first word...da da da da da... I was in denial at first, saying that you were actually saying la, but there's no denying it...you really like your da da da. And you were so impressed with your newfound abilities that you said it all during church one Sunday...LOUD. I tried to give you toys to quiet you down but then you were just flailing your toys around talking about your dad. I tried shoving a bottle in your mouth, but you were too smart for that. Anytime the choir would sing, your "da's" just got louder. I'm not sure if you were singing with them or trying to talk over them. I believe you were probably just praying for your dad since he didn't make it to church with us, but I figured the Lord (and the rest of the church-goers) had heard enough of your prayers so we left a little early.

You carried on with the da da da for a few weeks and that's fine. I mean, I'm only the one who carried you for 9 months and birthed you and who feeds you and gets up with you in the middle of the night and bathes you and rocks you to sleep...but that's alright. No big deal. I'm not bitter. :)

Anyway, your next words would certainly be ma ma ma. So I would say ma ma ma to teach you and help you learn it. And you would say da da da and smile SO big like you knew just what you were doing. I even tried to coax you with Ma Ma Marley and Ma Ma Maya. Clearly ma is an important sound in our house. You should really try it out. I think Maya's feelings are getting hurt. She's sensitive, you know.

So, then you moved on to ba and then la. Your Papaw is convinced you said Papaw recently and your dad thinks you said Vanna while watching Wheel of Fortune a few nights ago. I'm sure ma is coming soon. Probably somewhere after 'indigenous' and 'pumpernickel' and 'meatloaf'. "Ma! The meatloaf!"

You're sitting up on your own and you do a worm-like crawl to get where you're going (which is always after something you shouldn't have). You 'cluck' your tongue, like you would if you were trying to get a baby to look at you for a picture. Wonder where you picked that up. Maybe the paparazzi that follow you around with cameras (aka your mom and Ms. Sheree). You've also started doing this thing where if someone is holding you and not looking at you, you'll move your head down and around so that you're looking directly up at them in their line of vision. Kinda like you're saying 'Hey, Booger Nose, pay attention to me.' Makes me and your dad laugh every time. (Seems like that should be 'your dad and I', but that's not proper grammar. Trust me.)

To make you happy in your moments of grumpiness, we go outside (we've been blessed with an early and beautiful Spring), go look at ourselves in the bathroom mirror (you still love that) or go to the fridge. You love to play with all the bottles in the door. Your dad likes that you like that "muthturd" bottle. That's some strange thing between him and his friends that I'll let him explain to you when you're a bit older. The fact that you like to play in the fridge is a bit strange as well but it makes you happy so that makes your mama happy...your ma ma ma ma ma.....

And now, a few 8 month photos...my subject is getting a little more difficult to work with these days, as you can see.

 

And this is one of my new faves

All My Love,
Mom

Inappropriate Nursery Rhymin'

After seven and a half healthy months, Keller finally came down with a sickness (and of course, it came right before the weekend we had plans).  He’s got an ear infection in both ears and, we learned, small ear canals because they had to water pick him and stick painful looking foreign instruments in his ears to get the wax out so they could see his eardrums.  This was not a pleasant experience for mom or baby.  But despite this and the high fever he was running and the awful sounding cough, my sweet little boy has still been his happy natured self (aside from not wanting to be put down, but he’s sick and I find this totally acceptable).

He has also not been sleeping as well due to his illness.  And though he’s been napping fine, it takes him a little longer to fall asleep than normal, so I’ve been using this amazing singing voice of mine to sing him some tunes.  I have found out that I don’t know near as many nursery rhymes as I thought I did.  And I just realized that most of them are really short, requiring me to hurry up and come up with another one.  And I often times don’t remember the words, so I just make them up as I go along.  I sang him a song my Grandpa Winka always used to sing to me.  It goes “Down in the valley, Valley so low.”  That’s all I got.  I just made ‘em up after that.  “I hear you calling, calling me so.”  Calling me so?  That’s terrible.  It doesn’t even make sense. 

And then I moved on to “Hush little baby don’t say a word, Mama’s gonna buy you a mockingbird.”  Then there’s the lyric about the diamond ring.  And after that my free-styling skills kicked in and I just kept singing about things Mama’s gonna buy ya.  At one point in the song I was buying him wine with a cork…saddest part is not that I’m singing to my 7 month old about buying him wine or the fact that saying ‘wine with a cork’ is ridiculous, but that I was rhyming with work.  Work and cork don’t even rhyme.  Fail.  And just a few short lines later, while trying to rhyme with song, Mama was buying her baby a bong.  Seriously?!  This is all I could come up with?  Drug paraphernalia?  Fail #2.  That was when I decided it was best to end the song…and my dreams of becoming a rap star.  (In my defense, 'song' is a hard word to rhyme with in terms of what Mama’s gonna buy ya.)

So, this is the point where I apologize to my mother.  She has always told me how she would sing me Silent Night when I was a baby…Christmas time or not.  And I made fun of her for that.  But that’s what I reverted to in my moments of desperation.  Christmas songs in March.  Forget the 20 second nursery rhymes and the inappropriateness of my made up lyrics.  I know every word in the first 3 verses of Away in a Manger.

And finally, after I’d been through all of these, a random song popped into my head and so I just went back to that great ol’ tune.  You all know it.  Sing it with me.  “Ooooh, you better take me home tonight.  Ooooh, down beside that red fire light.  Are you gonna let it all hang out.  Fat bottomed girls you make the rockin’ world go round.”  And here we are again…inappropriate.

Here are some new pics.

7 months old

Bath time!

Love those eyes!

Dear Keller #2

Dear Keller –

6 months old already.  I can hardly believe it.  It’s amazing to me how much you’ve changed and how much you’ve learned to do in just 6 short months.  And, as with every other month you’ve grown older, this is my new favorite age!

You started rolling over shortly after you turned 4 months old.  You went to Ms. Sheree’s like any other day.  As I was sitting at work I started getting picture messages and I knew what was coming.  She managed to capture the entire roll-over.  I was so excited for this big accomplishment in your life…but so sad I missed it.  So I cried.  At work.  I sent your dad a text and asked him if he could hurry up and make more money…to which I promptly got a confused phone call.  I explained that you had rolled over and I had missed it and I was going to miss all your ‘firsts’ and if he’d just make more money I could stay home with you…to which he replied ‘Are you really crying at work?  People are probably making fun of you.’  Your dad’s super sympathetic.  :) 

You are eating all sorts of food now.  Being the amazing cook I am, I am making all of your food.  Made you banana tonight.  Whew!  Mashing that banana really took it out of me.  You love apples and bananas and sweet potatoes.  You also like squash and you’re still undecided on peas.  You eat them, but pretty hesitantly.  Avocado was the first food you had, and you really liked it at the time, but now that you’ve had a taste of other things, forget about it.  I can’t blame you on that one.

You sleep through the night like such a good boy, usually 9-10 hours a night.  We had to Ferberize you to get you to sleep that long, which involved lots of crying by both you and me, but it was worth it in the end.  I think.  As long as you don’t end up emotionally scarred.  And now that you can roll over, you like to sleep on your belly and will often sleep with your face straight down in the mattress.  Talk about freaking your mom out.  I was up Googling at midnight one night whether it was safe for you to sleep like that or not.  Google said it was…Google better be right.

You still LOVE watching TV, as you have pretty much since you came out of the womb.  We watch Wheel of Fortune every night and you love it…probably all of the colors and the fast pace and Pat Sajak’s funny jokes.  And it’s totally educational so I’m fine with you watching it.  You’re going to know how to spell by the time you’re 2.  ;)  A commercial for Wheel came on one day and you turned your head to watch…you recognized the theme song.  That’s either really sad or really amazing.  I’m going with amazing!  You also love Elmo.  If you’re upset and nothing else works, ‘Elmo’s Song’ on YouTube never fails.  Never.

You went on your first plane ride in January, when we went down to Florida to see your Grandpa & CoCo.  Our flights there and back were both delayed…apparently the airline didn’t care that I had my day all scheduled out and arranged around your eating schedule.  Whatever.  You were a perfect angel regardless.  We surprised your Grandpa for his 50^th birthday…put you in your car seat on his door step and hid.  He thought you were a doll.  When he finally figured out what was going on, he was totally surprised.  We went to the beach while we were there.  You ate the sand.  I thought you’d get a taste of it and realize you didn’t like it and not do it again.  I thought wrong.  We also went to our first art show and lots of great places to eat and you and I went for a walk every morning in the gorgeous January sunshine.  Someday you’re going to ask me why we choose to live in the Midwest when places like Florida and California exist...and I’m not going to have an answer for you.

You are a Mama’s boy…and I love it.  That is all.

You have found your voice and love to hear yourself squeal.  Or maybe you just like the attention you get from making such loud noises.  Either way, it usually gets a laugh from me and your dad.  And really, you like making noise in any manner.  Banging blocks together, slapping the table/high chair tray/computer, fake coughing, etc.  You also like to stand in front of the mirror and look at yourself and something about that makes you want to dance.  You get one little leg really going…I call it the Missouri One Step.  Cutest lil’ thing I ever did see.

And you like to laugh at the dogs.  You think they’re sooo funny when they come to give you kisses or lick your hands.  Marley is your protector.  He doesn’t let you far from him and he’s always right by your side when you’re crying.  And he doesn’t mind when you pull his hair or when we think it’s funny to act like he’s a horse and let you ride him.  I can already tell you and him are going to be best buds!  Vanilli, on the other hand…  You’ve tried to pet her a few times and I very hesitantly have let you, but only quickly.  I’m sure it won’t take long for you to learn about her.  She’s like a small mountain lion, not to be touched.  I’m not looking forward to the day you grab her tail or pet her too roughly or grab a chunk of her hair or look at her wrong.  She’s liable to leave you with a nub for a hand.  And Maya girl, she just wishes you’d throw that damn ball for her.

You still love your baths and your splashes are getting bigger and bigger.  I usually wind up nearly as wet as you.  We took you swimming for the first time last weekend and you loved it.  Finally somebody for your dad to play with in the pool!!!  He’s been waiting on this for a looong time.

Swimming with Dad

Lil’ Man, you have made this the best 6 months of my life and I wouldn’t trade it for the world.  I can’t wait to see what the next 6 months have in store for us.  

Such a happy baby!

6 Months Old

And Then There Was Christmas

So, Christmas came again this year.  Yep, I’m finally writing about it.  Over a month later.  Let’s all just accept the fact that until blogging is my full-time job, I’m likely going to write about things late.  Really late.  Glad we’re all on the same page now.

So, here’s how it all went down –

Friday night, the 23^rd, we had Christmas with the Cessna’s.  We left there with a cake pop maker, a popcorn maker, a rocking horse and a bottle of wine.  Keller’s already downed the bottle of wine and Dustin rides the shit out of that rocking horse, so clearly, we were off to a great start. 

Saturday, the 24^th, Keller and I spent the day in Olney with my mom.  B-Pa (the name we have affectionately dubbed for Brad) took us out to breakfast.  We went to Christmas Eve mass with Dustin’s family (even though Grandma Winka informed me more than once that it was our year to go to mass in Flora) and then out for some delicious Southern Illinois pizza that night.  Not to get off topic, but living in St. Louis, we have yet to find a pizza place that beats Joe’s, Monical’s or Bobe’s.  There’s nothing even close.  These St. Louis folk are deprived.

Christmas morning we got up and amazingly, Santa managed to find us all the way in Illinois.  This was more exciting for Dustin than anybody else.  For those of you who don’t know him, he’s like a 5 year old when it comes to Christmas.  He snoops for his gifts so they have to be well-hidden.  He’s too excited to sleep on Christmas Eve and wakes up early on Christmas morning (the only day of the year he wakes up early) and he LOVES opening gifts.  So, imagine his excitement in getting to open his AND Keller’s gifts this year!  He actually told me he was excited because he would get to open Keller’s gifts for the next few years and I had to burst his bubble that he was probably only going to get this year, so he better enjoy it while he could.

So, much to Dustin’s excitement, Keller (and by Keller, I mean Dustin) had lots of gifts to open.  Keller did help with the bags.  He pulled the tissue paper out, which went straight to his mouth.  He tried pulling the tissue paper out of one of Dustin’s gifts and Dustin smacked his hand and told him to get his own gifts.  Okay, that’s a lie.  Dana knows not to put Dustin’s gifts in bags.

We made our way to the Andrews family for lunch and then stopped in Olney at the Keller’s, where Keller met his cousin Ava, who is exactly one month younger than him.  And then it was on to the Winka’s for dinner.  Whew!  Talk about a long day!  And the next morning we woke up and started all over again with Christmas at my mom’s. 

Keller made quite the haul on his First Christmas…so much so that we weren’t able to bring it all back home in one load.  He got toys and toys and more toys and books and clothes and movies.  He got pj’s and sleepsacks and stuffed animals.  He got baby Tom’s & baby Sperry’s.  He got a rocking horse and a rocking frog.
 

But his favorite gift of all…the iPad.  I seriously cannot even use it if he’s within arms reach without him putting his grubby little paws on it.  I try to use it while he’s eating, thinking eating is way more important, so I’ll be able to get in some quality Facebook or Pinterest time.  Wrong.  Even with it behind his back, and a boob in his mouth, he stops eating and turns around, swiping his hand across it like he’s been using it all his life.  Same goes for my iPhone.  I bought him a Fisher Price cell phone for Christmas, but it’s push button, not touch screen, so he won’t have anything to do with it.  “Geez, Mom, push button is sooo last year.  And I can’t even get Angry Birds on this.  Seriously, it looks like a Zach Morris phone.  I’d get your money back.”  He’s a techie snob already.

Merry Christmas in February!

Sleep...

I'm reposting this because I had to delete it because I'm having Internet Explorer/computer/blog/some sort of technology issues and this was something my google search suggested...it didn't work.

So, we’ve had a little hiccup in our sleeping routine.  Actually, it was more like a belch.  A really long, loud belch similar to that of Will Ferrell’s character in Elf.  (“Did you hear that?”)  Let me start from the beginning.

By about two and a half months, Keller was getting up just once a night (and sometimes he would even sleep through the night).  Around three and a half months he was starting to outgrow the bassinet that he slept in, in the Pack n Play in our room.  So we decided we would move him out of it and into the regular part of the Pack n Play for a few nights so he could get adjusted to it and then we would move him into his crib.  Keller had other ideas.

Since night 1 of post-bassinet life, Keller would wake up a minimum of ten times a night.  This is not an exaggeration (believe me, I wish it were!).  The majority of these wakings would come within the first two hours of putting him down, where Dustin and I would take turns (though my turn seemed to come more often than his) going in and bouncing him after hearing him cry yet again.  Asleep in 3 minutes, awake in 10, asleep in 2 minutes, awake in 5 and on and on and on.

Fast forward a month and nothing had changed, now four and a half months old.  Still in the Pack n Play in our room (Don’t judge me – I actually just read something stating that they should really be in their parents room until 6 months to help avoid SIDS, but I digress.) and still doing this sleep, cry, bounce routine.

At this point we’d tried everything.  We tried different bed times, the noise machine, swaddling and no swaddling, eating rice cereal and solids, the vibration feature on the Pack n Play, different positions in the bed (maybe the feng shui wasn’t right when placed parallel, let’s try perpendicular).  We tried the lights on, lights off, night lights, Christmas lights and every combination therein.  It’s safe to say lighting was not the issue.  I read books and blogs and message boards and magazine articles and Googled until I could Google no more.  I even went out and bought this fancy projector that plays music and projects images on to the ceiling thinking that might “entertain” him right to sleep.

And the music – we listened to lullabies, classical music, Christmas music, my labor playlist on my iPod, music on YouTube, white noise, heartbeats, etc., etc., etc.  The one song that did (and still does) soothe him is Marry Me by Train.  This is the only slow song on my phone so I would play it when rocking him to sleep when he was younger (as if he’s sooo old now).  Apparently, it stuck with him because the song now has magical powers.  We played it when trying to get him back to sleep and would often leave it on throughout the night.  I think I’ve now heard it at least 5,000 times.  (“Forever could never be long enough for me, to feel like I’ve had long enough with you.”  The line certainly fits.)

So with just a week before his 5 month birthday, not knowing what else to do (and at the doctor’s suggestion), we opted for the Ferber method (a version of cry it out).  I originally said no way would I do that.  It’s mean, it’s cruel, it’s torture.  There’ll be crying and screaming and sadness and tears…and it will be really hard on him, too.  But there comes a point when you’re at your wits end, and I was at that point.

Night 1 – Worst. Night. Ever.  We did the check on him/soothe him after 1, 5, 10 & 15 minutes (and by we, I mean I).  Hearing him cry is one thing.  Actually going in and seeing him cry and look up at you with those sweet, sad eyes, tears rolling down his face, wondering why you won’t pick up him up (“All I want is a little bounce, Mom”) is another.  That rips your heart out.  Somewhere after the 15 minute check he gave in to sleep.  He cried for 40 minutes; I cried for an hour.  I’m sure I’m psychologically damaging him.  He’ll probably have abandonment issues when he gets older, amongst other things, but at least we’ll be sleeping (hopefully)…

Night 2 – Same exact amount of time, but I made dad do the dirty work.

Night 3 – Dad was gone so mom’s turn again.  Eek!  I went in at my scheduled time (after 5 minutes of crying) and did the soothing thing (which, by the way, does no good for either party) and re-evaluated the situation.  In my attempt to “entertain” him to sleep, or at least, make him feel comfy, I had turned his mobile on, so there were elephants dancing in circles and singing above his head, I had a night light on, I had my fancy new projector projecting animal scenes onto the ceiling and playing music and I had the giraffe noise machine on for good measure.  Holy overstimulation!  Who could sleep with all that?  So, I gave the dancing elephants the night off, stopped the animal scenes above, cut out the music and just left the giraffe’s white noise and a night light.  Magic.  Within just a few minutes he was asleep.

Since that time, it’s been 5 minutes or less every night.  Occasionally he wakes up after a little while, but goes back to sleep within 5 minutes.  And he sleeps 9-10 hours each night, which is amazing.  I can’t say that I’m a Ferber advocate, but I will say that it absolutely works and if you’ve tried everything else, it’s definitely worth a shot.  I’m a believer.