I'm One Month Old!

Hey!  This is Keller.  I’m writing for my mom because she’s sooo tired (she can’t help it, she’s old).  I had my one month birthday yesterday.  Woo Hoo!!  What a day it was!  Mom put me to bed around 9 (and then again around 10:30) Sunday night, but with my birthday quickly approaching, I was having a hard time sleeping.  So, I woke up again around 11:15, but I was still a little early for the big day.  So, back to sleep.  But the next time, PARTY!!  It was 12:25 a.m. on 08/22, my one-month birthday!  This is it!  ♪Celebration…let’s all celebrate and have a good time!♪  Put on your party hats, party people.  Break out the cake and ice cream. (None for me, thanks. I’ll just have milk.) 

So, I ate and mom put me back to sleep around 1.  Then 2:00 rolled around.  It’s still my birthday!  ♪Go Shorty.  It’s your birthday.♪  Why aren’t we up partying?  So then we were.  Mom fed me and put me in my bed half an hour later.  What she didn’t know is that I was only pretending to be sleeping…little trick I learned.  She put me down and Surprise!  ♪Happy Birthday to Me, Happy Birthday to Me…♪  Mom, we can’t sleep now, my big day’s just begun.  So, we didn’t.  We stayed awake to celebrate this momentous occasion.  To add to the fun of the day, as mom was changing my diaper, I went ahead and peed.  That’s another little trick I’ve learned and gotten really good at.

Back to sleep around 3 and back up around 4:45.  Now mom, this is getting ridiculous.  We’re sleeping away my big day.  ♪It’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to.♪  Even so, mom thought sleep was important.  So, back to sleep around 5:15 and back up around 7.  Back to sleep around 7:20 and back up shortly after 8.  Finally mom wisened up and just let me sleep on her chest, my favorite way to sleep (and hers, too).

That afternoon I got to meet my cousin Rome for the first time (and Brooke and Aunt Joni, too).  We talked about sports and trucks and women…you know, guy stuff.  Mama says he’s really cute.  He likes to stick his tongue out…I gotta learn how to do that.

After our long day, mom was totally unprepared for my one month pictures…she didn’t have a sign or an outfit or anything.  What a slacker.  So, she just snapped a few photos right before bed.  Sweet mom.

Speaking of bed, if it’s possible, I slept even worse that night than the night before.  Must have been all the excitement from my big day, but I was not done celebrating yet.  I get that from my Grandma Keller.  I mean, she celebrates her birthday for an entire month.  All I’m asking is for one full day.

Even after all of this, Mom said it’s been the best month of her life.  It’s been the best month of my life too.  ;) 

Party on, Wayne.  Party on, Garth.

Stupid F***in' Duck

We gave Keller his first real bath a couple weeks ago and it went real bad.  Let me start by telling you the moral of this story is – Use common sense, not a rubber duck.  Read on…

So, I was all excited to give him his first bath and try out his new bathtub.  Now, the little man hates to be cold (he gets this from his mama), so I wasn’t sure how well he was going to like this.  He cries and trembles anytime he gets his diaper or clothes changed, so being naked in a tub of water might not be his thing, but I was excited to give it a try nonetheless. 

So, Dustin’s getting him ready and I’m getting his tub ready.  Enter the rubber duck.  We registered for and received one of the water temperature rubber ducks.  All you new parents know it…it has something on the bottom that tells you if the water is too hot for baby.  I thought it changed colors, like from the yellow to red if it was too hot, but that’s not the case (that would make too much sense).  Instead, it has a purple dot on the bottom with the word HOT, also in purple.  If the water’s too hot, HOT turns white.  Got it, let’s give it a go. 

I put it in the water…HOT.  Okay, let’s go a little cooler.  Try it again…HOT.  Hmm.  It doesn’t feel that hot to me, but I like my bath water just under scalding, so I’m probably not the best judge.  Colder still…HOT still.  Now, what the hell?!?!  This goes on until the water is cold.  Not warm or lukewarm, but cold.  And the damn duck is still yelling HOT.  (Okay, it doesn’t actually yell, but we all know that all caps signifies yelling.)

This is where common sense should come into play, but I’m just trying to obey the duck.  I mean, I’m a new mom, and I don’t know any better and I don’t expect the cute, innocent looking duck is going to lead me astray.  (I should also note the duck has on a police officer uniform.  Who wouldn’t trust a police officer duck?)  I certainly don’t want to scald my child.  And then I’d have to take him to the ER within his first 2 weeks of life like a terrible mother.  And then DCFS would have to come in and I’d have to explain that I disobeyed they duck and they’d be all “Why wouldn’t you listen to the duck?  It even has a police uniform on for crying out loud.”

So, onto the bath.  He’s pissed already because he’s naked and cold, which of course causes him to literally piss…right on my hand.  It must be a motherly instinct thing that kicks in, because pee on my hand would normally be repulsive, but it doesn’t even phase me.  Lower him into the tub…even more pissed.  Screaming, crying, trembling.  All this is causing me to become totally frazzled.  Dustin’s trying to help, but there’s not much that could help the situation at that point.  So, he got about a 45 second washing and I decided that was enough torture (for all of us) for one night.  We got him all wrapped up and warmed up and settled down in his towel and *Squirt*.  Yep, he pooped in the towel.  Pretty much sums up what he thought about that bath.  I’m sorry Keller, that you have to be our little guinea pig, but that’s part of being the oldest child.  At least it only took one, really fast, bath to figure it out. 

I am happy to report that he has had several baths since that first one, and he actually enjoys them.  The duck was retired after just one bath.  He’s currently unemployed, but will take on the role of ‘bath toy’ in the future. 

After the first bath - didn't even have time to take my pic in the tub

2nd bath - this isn't so bad!

Note the evil duck in the background...just a toy at this point

Labor Music

I looked all over the internet for several months prior to my due date for songs that would be good to play during labor and, though I found a couple suggestions of artists, I didn’t ever find a good playlist like I was looking for.  So, I thought I’d share mine in case it may help anybody.  It’s all pretty mellow music, because dance jams aren’t really appropriate in the delivery room.  A lot of these are love songs meant for ‘lovers’ (I hate that word), but I’ve found it’s amazing how many of the verses or entire songs can actually be applied to my love for my new little man.  Anyway, here’s my list:

1. Night Train – Amos Lee (Not really the best lyrics for a delivery, but I like the song)
2. When I’m 64 – The Beatles
3. Morning Yearning – Ben Harper
4. Happy Ever After In Your Eyes – Ben Harper
5. When She Believes – Ben Harper
6. Burn One Down – Ben Harper (Okay, not the best lyrics at all for a delivery, but this is one of my favorite songs of his.  Not because I ‘burn one down’, just a great little beat.)
7. Is This Love – Bob Marley & The Wailers
8. No Woman, No Cry – Bob Marley & The Wailers (I had to smile a little when this song came on during the pain of labor.)
9. Three Little Birds – Bob Marley & The Wailers
10. Stir It Up – Bob Marley & The Wailers
11. One Love – Bob Marley & The Wailers
12. When Did You Fall in Love with Me – Chris Rice
13. Arms – Christina Perri  ‘I never thought that you’d be the one to hold my heart.  But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start.’
14. You’re the World to Me – David Gray 
15. Banana Pancakes – Jack Johnson
16. Questions – Jack Johnson
17. Supposed to Be – Jack Johnson
18. Do You Remember – Jack Johnson
19. Better Together – Jack Johnson
20. Talk of the Town – Jack Johnson & Kawika Kahiapo
21. Lullaby- Jack Johnson & Matt Costa
22. Better Man – James Morrison  'For you, I give my soul to keep.  You see me, love me, just the way I am.  For you, I am a better man.  I said you are the reason for everything that I do.  I'd be lost, so lost, without you.'
23. You Give Me Something – James Morrison
24. Coming Home – John Legend
25. You and Tequila – Kenny Chesney & Grace Potter
26. Come Away With Me – Norah Jones
27. Kandi – One EskimO
28. Good Life – OneRepublic
29. Just Breathe – Pearl Jam
30. Blackbird – Sarah Maclachlan

Keller's Birth Day

So, little man, the story of your birth all starts on Thursday, July 21st.  I had a little talk with you on my way to work that morning (as I'm sure you remember), informing you how that would be a good day to make your big arrival...if you were ready.  I was already 4 cm dilated and our doctor was on call that day, and that day only.  Plus, this was about the last day you could come so that we could still make aunt Ashley's wedding.  Being that you were getting your first 'real' uncle, I know you knew it was pretty important that you be there.  So, the rest of that day went as normal.  That night I decided to go for a little walk, just in case that might help you to make your descent.  When I say little walk, I mean little.  It was about 100 degrees out with a pregnancy heat index of 200.  So, we made it about a block before I felt like I was going to pass out and came back in.  That must have been all you needed though.

That night I woke up to pee around 11:00 and again at 12:30 and again at 2:30.  This may not sound strange for a pregnant woman, but for me it was.  You woke me up like clockwork every night in the 1:00 hour and 4:00 hour for peeing, so all of this extra was a little unusual.  As I woke up at 2:30, I decided to see if it would just go away and I could go back to sleep.  I remember Maya laying right beside me and I hated to disturb her.  Waiting it out lasted about 10 seconds before I could hold it no longer (Oh my goodness, am I peeing myself?), so I ran to the bathroom.  At this point, I wasn't sure if my water had broken or if I'd just officially lost control of my bladder.

I yelled at your dad letting him know something was going on and he said "Okay" or something equally as helpful (don't wake daddy when he's sleeping), so we called the doctor instead, who advised us to head to the hospital.

Now, it's a good thing I wasn't in any pain at that point, because we both just kind of mosied around the house as if this were any other morning.  We brushed our teeth, finished packing bags and loaded them in the car, discussed what we should do with the dogs, rounded up the laptop, phones, chargers, camera, etc.  Thirty minutes later we were on our way to the hospital and by 4:30 we were in our delivery room, calling and delivering the news (we couldn't call on our way to the hospital and get everyone excited and on their way only to find out I'd peed myself).

The contractions were getting pretty strong by this time and I held out until around 6, when I could take no more and asked nicely for the nurse to come in with the epidural.  When I hadn't heard anything 10 minutes later, I might have dropped an f-bomb, but that was the only time, and I think that's pretty good, all things considered. 

So, the epidural came around 6 (oh, sweet relief!) and when I was still only at 4 cm, the pitocin came around 7.  Never did I imagine I'd be in labor, hanging out watching the Today Show, but that's just what we did.  Aunt Ashley and Uncle Nick came and then Grandma Keller showed up and then Mamaw & Papaw Andrews...all of us just hanging out in the delivery room like we did this all the time.

At 10:00 I was fully dilated so the pushing began (I will fast forward through all the messy details here) and at 10:58 a.m., you did it...you made your arrival into the world.

From the second I laid eyes on you and you were laid on my chest, I was totally in love.  Now, I love your dad and all of your family and your four-legged siblings as if they were my kids, but this love...this was a love unlike any I'd ever known before.  I've known my whole life that I wanted to be a mother, but never could I have imagined just how great it would be.  I stare at you while you sleep and am still amazed that you're mine.  You are absolutely perfect and I feel like the luckiest person in the whole world.  I love you Keller Allen.

P.S.  The doctor called you a miracle baby because something happened with the placenta, but I was on morphine at that point so it wasn't making any sense to me and, though your dad wasn't on morphine, I don't think he really understood it either.  No matter what, you are our little miracle!